My father never let me do any dangerous activities and he has his criterion about what is “dangerous.” For example, I could never swim in a sea, even near the shore. Cooking alone was never allowed. Moreover, he always insisted on driving me home after any event even though all of my friends went home by themselves. I remember what he said before I departed my home country to the States for college. “I don’t want you to be brave. Never go out of the campus after 6 p.m.”
I was confused about this and I always wondered why. One night, I asked him about this during family dinner. Suddenly, he became serious and told me a story.
It was about 40 years ago, when China was still an undeveloped country and chairperson Mao encouraged every woman to have many children. My grandfather’s family was huge and the parents could not pay much attention to each child they had. My grandpa was energetic and brave. He loved to play outside. Once, he took my father and my uncle to the beach. Then he went swimming and left the brothers alone.
My father was 14 and my uncle was 10 that time. That was an age of curiosity. They were bored with playing in the sand, so they imitated other adults, and walked into the sea water. However, they were too young to bear the waves, and started drowning.
That was a warm and drowsy day. People on the beach were all enjoying the grace of the sun. They were chatting, laughing or swimming. Nobody noticed the brothers. My father was just learning to swim. “I thought I was dead that time,” he said seriously, “I regretted about it and I was so worried about your uncle. He couldn’t swim at all.”
“I felt every second like years. That must be the feeling of death. At that moment, I almost gave up, but my natural desire for survival didn’t allow me to do so.” My father murmured.
Finally, after great struggle, my father somehow made it out himself and swam to the shore. My uncle was clever enough to walk under water to the shore. They both survived without anyone noticing and my father thought that was a miracle. Then he swore that he would never get involved in any dangerous activity. r
For certain, I am the one that my father loves the most. He values me more than himself. He is afraid of losing me. He could not bear anything that could harm me. He kept rambling on about the importance of safety and seemed to be overwrought. I felt confused, but I chose to accept his ideas after hearing his story. Good or bad, it is just his expression of love.